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I would like to tell you A Story about my family, or rather my family's pets. It begins Once Upon A Time, because it was a few years ago and that is a long time ago now, when we had chickens, and then all of the chickens were killed by something except for one. One chicken, who was white.
Also crazy.
You think I'm exaggerating? I am totally not. That chicken was almost as crazy as as our duck Katrinka* had been. For one, it fought our cat and dog over a lizard. For two, it thought it was a dog and tried to come into the house and sleep on the dog's blankets and hang around on the front porch. It did not cluck. It made extremely strange noises that sounded like what a chicken might sound like if it was trying to bark. I cannot emphasize enough the part where it tried to come into our house. I mean, some of our other chickens had done this, yes, but only a few feet in, and they fled as soon as you looked at them. This chicken would come ten or twenty feet in and stand there staring at you until you noticed, and it wouldn't leave unless you chased it out.
We named it C.D.C. - Carnivorous Dog Chicken - and buried it when it died, a little worried that it might come back as a zombie. It hasn't.
Yet.
*Katrinka made herself a giant nest out of leaves. After she had laid all of her eggs, every day she would roll all of the eggs out the nest, move the nest a few inches, and then roll the eggs back in. She ended up moving it about ten feet total during the incubation. Only three ducklings hatched, and because she was crazy she didn't give them the oil they needed to float and two of them drowned in a one-foot deep pool. The last one got eaten by a snake. Her mother was Katrina, and they looked almost identical, except for the part where her mother wasn't insane.
(so, telling weird stories about my family/pets is apparently my way of coping with a mix of boredom (I can't go anywhere yet), pain (killlll the flu!), and extreme frustration (hi, procrastination/anti-feminism creeps/no SPN episode/being way behind on school!). sorry?)
Also crazy.
You think I'm exaggerating? I am totally not. That chicken was almost as crazy as as our duck Katrinka* had been. For one, it fought our cat and dog over a lizard. For two, it thought it was a dog and tried to come into the house and sleep on the dog's blankets and hang around on the front porch. It did not cluck. It made extremely strange noises that sounded like what a chicken might sound like if it was trying to bark. I cannot emphasize enough the part where it tried to come into our house. I mean, some of our other chickens had done this, yes, but only a few feet in, and they fled as soon as you looked at them. This chicken would come ten or twenty feet in and stand there staring at you until you noticed, and it wouldn't leave unless you chased it out.
We named it C.D.C. - Carnivorous Dog Chicken - and buried it when it died, a little worried that it might come back as a zombie. It hasn't.
Yet.
*Katrinka made herself a giant nest out of leaves. After she had laid all of her eggs, every day she would roll all of the eggs out the nest, move the nest a few inches, and then roll the eggs back in. She ended up moving it about ten feet total during the incubation. Only three ducklings hatched, and because she was crazy she didn't give them the oil they needed to float and two of them drowned in a one-foot deep pool. The last one got eaten by a snake. Her mother was Katrina, and they looked almost identical, except for the part where her mother wasn't insane.
(so, telling weird stories about my family/pets is apparently my way of coping with a mix of boredom (I can't go anywhere yet), pain (killlll the flu!), and extreme frustration (hi, procrastination/anti-feminism creeps/no SPN episode/being way behind on school!). sorry?)